So in a few hours, I am off to St. Louis to tend to some family affairs. It will be a long journey, as any journey out of Idaho. But after a four hour bus ride and two flights, on top of weather conditions, we'll see how I feel.
Of course, I'm grateful beyond words that I get to go home and spend time with my family. My mother needs me right now, and I can't wait to get back in touch with my sisters. I'll get to send some time with my in-laws too. And there is a piece of me that won't be whole again until I get to see my dad. Although 2,000 miles isn't nearly wide enough to break the bond we share.
All of this and I'm still shaking with nerves at the thought of going home again. No matter how much I love my mother, I can not deny that she is a crazy person. I am dreading our initial meeting because if I show up too fat, she will ask if I'm pregnant. If I show up too skinny, she will think my husband isn't taking care of me. (P.S> there is no middle ground. Inevitably, I will be one or the other.) I've packed all my best outfits because otherwise she is going to assume the mormons have burned all my clothes in a satanic ritual bonfire. And I'll be wearing enough makeup to make a french whore jealous.
As much as I love her, I'm terrified to be alone in the same room with her for fear of my fragile self-esteem. I wish Matt was coming with me. He always knows what to say, and he's always that perfect buffer. I can't believe I'm fretting about this, but after all this time together I can't fathom spending five days away from him.
Today I did everything I could to make sure he would be alright while I was away. I stocked up on groceries, deposited the paychecks, did the laundry and cleaned the apartment. I just hope I don't come home to find the apartment in filth with Matt rocking in the fetal position in his underwear spouting proudly, "I cut my own hair!"
But I'm sure it will be fine. I have to finish packing.
4 comments:
You're hilariously sober and I love it. I hope all goes well and I completely understand the family/weird thing. You'll be great! And you look great, so all in all, you're actually a french model.
HAHAHA!!! Oh, honey! I hope things go well with your mom.
I'm surprised you don't come home to find Matthew like that on a regular basis! LOL. HEHEheheheheeee!! You're too cute.
I am going to miss you, but I know it will be a blast. Just have fun and make the most of weird family situations! :)
I have been pondering over the Last Diffalo nick name that your Dad gave you. It seems like you are very special to him. And there is nothing wrong with being a Daddy's Girl. I have several. But I do have an issue with the word LAST. I prefer to think of you as the FIRST. A Diffalo is such a sweet, kind creature of our Heavenly Father. And your Dad is correct in saying that they are very rare. But from you and your influence, you can start a whole new generation of peaceful, kind, tender Diffalos. Please hurry home as your "Idaho Dad" is already missing you. And don't let all of the "Monster Boogers" get you down. Because you ARE better than they are. :-)
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